And I'm so happy. It's weird. I am SO happy! I rode it home through a large part of Brooklyn (wearing my helmet, of course) and had the BEST time.
I've had a really nice mountain bike for a few years and I never ride it. Maybe a few times a year I take it out for a spin around the park, but the way it rides scares me. It's made to go REALLY fast... I don't like that. It's really far off the ground, I don't like that either. I fall a LOT and the thought of falling while moving at high speeds scares the shit out of me.
I grew up riding a cruiser with a butterfly motif through the streets of Boston (ugh... at least they had parks) and loving it. Now they make them for adults!
In particular, Electra and Schwinn. I highly recommend checking them out if you think you like to bike but don't find yourself doing it that much. My new bike, the Electra Cruiser "Gigi", makes me want to ride around Brooklyn all day. Seriously.
I rode my bike home to my apartment and then took it right out again to the organic grocery store a few blocks away to pick up some stuff for dinner. I'm getting a couple of rear-mounted baskets put on in a week or so so I can go to the store and not kill my back with groceries in a backpack on the way home.
I feel all relaxed now and happy and I EXERCISED ... not only did I exercise but it was FUN! THAT never happens to me. It's fun AFTER but not during. It's never fun during! Unless I'm really stressed out.
Cloud nine. Here's a photo. Now I have to go take a shower because I stink. Hurrah!
So I have decided to partially document the diet I have begun... again.
I have struggled with my weight for a long, long, long time. Even when I was thin/skinny/svelt I struggled and felt fat. I now look back at those photos of myself and think, "Holy crap, I would KILL to be that weight again". Getting older and having a slower metabolism doesn't help.
This is not reflective of my general feeling of attractiveness, sexiness, hotness etc. But I do want to lose a fairly significant amount of weight and since I have struggled with this for a while I thought I would write down some thoughts, choices, experiences as I go along. Maybe someone else will find them useful.
I have given up sugar until my birthday which is in July. I am allowed to have cake on my husband's birthday which is June and then will have a shit-ton of sugar on my birthday and make myself sick doing so. I LOVE cake. Love love love love love. I was not allowed to eat sugar growing up, or really eat a lot of anything, so now I feel immense pleasure when I get to gorge on desserts. So we'll see how that goes. I'm already (3 days in) psychotic with sugar cravings. I am allowing myself sugar in my tea and a little on my oatmeal. If you've ever eaten plain oatmeal then you know why.
No desserts, no sugary cereals, no chocolate milk etc. I'm also trying to work out 3-5 times/week (cardio & weights at the gym, yoga, kickboxing, pilates at home). And, of course, I am watching my fat, salt, and carb intake. I eat a lot of low fat meats, vegetables and fruits. The grains I do eat I try to make whole and keep them on the lighter side (Weight Watchers bread etc.). I will be doing Weight Watchers online which I have done before and it's really helped me.
I love all kinds of food passionately. I love to bake, to cook, to go out to eat. I grew up with a mother who enjoyed abstaining from foods in order to preserve her lovely figure - as a result this behavior is repugnant to me so dieting brings out a lot of negative feelings. I am trying to balance all these feelings with the feelings of wanting to feel good about my body, especially as I get older, and watch my health.
I'm 3 days into the no-sugar thing and I want to drown myself in a vat of melted chocolate. I literally moaned out loud at the deli today looking at my favorite chocolate bar. I think the woman behind the counter probably thought, "No wonder she's fat... she's moaning out loud at the mere SIGHT of chocolate." I was on my way home from the gym and was ravenous.
Ok! Off to shower and get back to my day. [Big, forced smile.]
In fact, anyone who knows me (which is everyone reading this) is now laughing.
However.
I just came back from the gym and am so tired I can barely type. I actually enjoy this feeling. It lowers my anxiety level which is notable and eventually, combined with watching what i eat, makes me look better.
I am going to share with you my workout regime because I know nobody cares. If you are interested in getting in shape and have a hard time doing it perhaps you can use some of this for your own regime.
I am not suggesting that I am in great shape, merely that this particular regime has helped me achieve a certain level of fitness (that level being not dead) for a few years. I used to be a jogger at a few different periods in my life and then I got plantars fasciitis (which is a tearing of the ligament that runs along the bottom of your foot) in both feet. And although my injury has healed enough for me to workout again on a regular basis I basically can no longer jog. Sad. I actually dream about jogging and wish that I could. Maybe someday.
Btw, the cure for plantars fasciitis as far as I can tell having done much research, gone to podiatrists, general physicians and fitness stores is stretching, stretching and more stretching. I stretch after every single workout and sometimes even if I don't go to the gym. I got cortisone shots, heel pads, splints to wear at night etc. Stretching out my hamstrings was the only thing that helped. That and a therapist. But that's a different story. And a different kind of demon.
1. Must do at least 4-5 workouts of cardio per week.
2. Each cardio workout should be at least 30 mins long, preferably 40-45 mins.
3. In the beginning I work up to the level at which I want to work out. I often start much lower than I end up doing regularly. Be patient. If you rush yourself you will injure yourself and have to start all over again.
4. I do elliptical machines myself - I hate the stairmaster and cannot run so they are challenging and good on my joints and feet. I do 5-10 mins of warm-up (i.e., a low resistance); then I alternate every 3 minutes from moderate levels to hard levels back and forth until I hit about 25 minutes or until I cannot do it anymore and then I workout on moderate or easy until it is time to quit.
5. Always listen to your body. If you're tired and can't do a hard workout then don't. You can do one tomorrow. I have injured myself many times forcing myself to do something because I "should".
6. (This is the other really important part.) Must do at least 2 muscle toning workouts per week. This includes lifting weights and doing situps/push-ups/pilates/yoga-type stretching. This is a key element to losing weight. Cardio alone will not do it. Not really.
7. Take a pilates class and learn some of the moves. I use them on my own and they are extremely helpful in building muscle mass and core strength and in stretching. I do 3 reps of at least 20 sit-ups and often lift weights with my arms in between each reps to break it up. I also lift weights on machines once a week.
Learn the plank position. It's fucking hard. It will help your core strength almost immediately.
The first time I did it I could only do it for five seconds I think. I'm now at 40 seconds. 1 minutes is really good (according to me).
Always, always stretch. And always drink lots of water.
That's it. I have to shower now.
Oh, and if you want to see in shape... check out Vincent Cassel in Ocean's Twelve.
